The world has become more sophisticated, and today’s age group are becoming wealthier, flashier, and more prone to interchanging relationships as if they were garments. The ability to quickly secure a relationship is now only a text message away, a tweet or a FaceBook friend request. There are Match.com, Tinder, Zoosk and many more that I, the older person, am barely familiar with. The reasons for being in a relationship are as varied as there are fish in the sea. Often people don’t truthfully disclose exactly what it is they are looking for, and if many did, they’d find themselves perpetually alone. Beyond love, relationships are sought for money, security, sex, validation, companionship and hundreds of other reasons, all falling under the umbrella of love.
So, why do people lie about what they truly want in a relationship? Why can’t people just come out and say what it is exactly they are looking for from the opposite sex? I think people lie because people cannot accept the truth. People want to hear the fairy tale, live the dream, believe that they are desired by the opposite sex for attributes inherent to that particular person, and believe that some classical moral reasoning associated with chivalry is the tip of the iceberg. Let’s face it, most men don’t want to be with a woman so he can support her financially, work hard just to give it away for the sake of love, following some lifelong societal tradition of man’s obligation to woman, rather he just wants the convenience of having her around to satisfy his ego and his sexual cravings. But there are other things as well, so don’t get upset by the truth.
And women don’t always choose a man for love; women want security, a man to protect and provide for her and the little family they’ve created together. Women don’t want to be strapped to some guy’s bed, made to feel like a sex tool, cooking and cleaning all in the name of love; what a sham humankind has been served. People cannot even be honest with each other for fear of being alone. Not saying that women don’t want love.
So basically, people will continue to lie and live under the pretence that love is all that matters. And they’ll call that truth because people believe that truth has versions. And that when the fire of passion is extinguished, they keep on living in a relationship because love is a choice, marriage and relationships are a choice, and that time has proven we are capable of being and doing anything. But honestly, people should be able to meet someone and go through the ritual of dating, do what it takes to impress and charm the object of your desire and then say “I’d like to make love to you,” all without being made to feel like you have just committed the biggest offence in the world. Or being a woman saying, “I am looking for a man who can help take care of my three kids and me, the last shit left us footing the bill,” This is what I call complete honesty. Rather than go through the pretence of being in a relationship for love and doing all the things to circuitously arrive at a point you already had figured out in the beginning. If you can begin a relationship with complete honesty, then the chances of that relationship lasting are greatly improved.